


Life After Death

by Ihavealotoffeelings



Category: Russian Doll
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-12
Updated: 2019-02-16
Packaged: 2019-10-26 16:44:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,247
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17749655
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ihavealotoffeelings/pseuds/Ihavealotoffeelings
Summary: This isn't going to be great writing okBut I need to see how Nadia and Alan are doing after all thatRussian Doll was so good on showing mental healthI think they have a connection which should stay idk if it's romantic or not just bc dependence





	1. Chapter 1

Once the timelines combined, Alan remembered what Nadia said to him when he was drunk and spilling stuff in Ferrans store.  
  
"You're the one I care about"  
  
He knew it when she linked arms with him walking down the street.  
  
When she put him to sleep with the story of them.  
  
And they both knew how much their lives meant to the other.

  
"Can you promise me if I don't jump I'll be happy?"  
  
"Idk man. Absolutely not. But I can promise you you won't be alone."

  
  
Their relationship was a friends, benefits, older to younger sibling mixed mess. It was far from perfect. The sex may have been a huge mistake.  
  
But what mattered was they were together.

  
  
So after they paraded through down town with Horse and paper mache demons, Alan looked at her like he never wanted it to end.  
  
Her face tried to stop her from being vulnerable like always but the words came out  
  
"Hey man, uh I don't think we should be..alone rn. You wanna sleep at my place?"  
  
He grinned, making the few freckles on his cheeks stick out.  
  
"Yea, yes. I mean, we did just survive 20 deaths together."  
  
"Exactly! This calls for a celebration"

* * *

  
They drank and ate stale cake in her apartment, while playing video games and trying who could do worse fake accents.  
  
"I'm gonna hit the sack, you can do whatever." She pointed to the couch then bed.  
  
She drunkenly looked down at her cleavage, looked at him then winked, threw herself on the Bed and looked to be passed out  
  
He laughed to himself. His friend was such a fucking weirdo.  
  
He stayed on the couch and layed down  
"Goodnight Nadia"  
  
He heard a faint  
"Night Alan" muffled into her pillow

* * *

  
  
The next morning, he had forgotten to turn off his phone alarm, so Nadia awoke to a symphony concert. The song that had played every morning for him death or not.  
  
She blinked and wiped at the ample eyeliner.  
"Ahh, what the fuck is that?"  
She grogially yelled  
  
"Sorry! I forgot to turn it off!'  
  
She smushed the pillow into her ears throwing another towards the couch.  
  
He was able to shut it off and came to stand by her bed  
  
"Morning to you too"  
  
She sat up and looked around for awhile  
  
"What?" He asked  
  
"Idk I've never really done this before. Should we get coffee or? More booze?"  
  
He shrugged "I could make breakfast"  
  
She raised her eyebrows but a smile edged on her lips.

* * *

  
  
While eating toast she rummaged through her mail and unpaid bills. He tried not to but Alan did shake his head slightly at all the disorganization.  
  
He examined the suduko on his phone intently. Now that they were seemingly free from death anything they did would have more consequences. They were real friends. They were happy. But what now  
  
"You know it's ironic, you have such an analytical mind but your kitchen looks like a Jackson pollack"  
He felt like they could joke now, he hoped. But he said it lightly with a kind smile just in case.  
  
She flipped through the mail  
"Hm you're real astute there Einstein" she mocked defensively  
"I guess everything in our life is now" he continued mostly to himself  
  
"Yea well my only maternal figure shot me in the back so, L'chaim."  
 She replied flatly, while her big brown eyes widened in memory.  
  
  
He stared at her  
"Ohmygod, Nadia"  
  
She waved him off  
"Yea yea, it's fine. Next time I wake up crying about it then you can do something"  
  
He stared at her still.  
"Okay." He promised  
She met his eyes. She smiled.

* * *

  
  
They had that unspoken communication with a lot of things. It was starting to show and it was starting to confuse people. No one really knew how they met or why they were so close suddenly. But just looking at them you could tell they had been through a world together.  
  
So when Alan stopped by the market the next day to pick up Oatmeal , Ferran almost didn't ask.  
  
"..what's going on?"  
"Hm?" Alan replied genuinly

  
"I've known you and Nadia for years and you've never even seen each other till a few days ago"  
  
Alan looked down realizing they might have to come up with something. He gave his friend a tired smile  
  
"Its, really weird I know. But I promise,You don't have to worry about it"  
Seeing his friend so calm, and especially telling someone "not to worry" about something, was unsettling.  
  
But he also looked so happy. So for now Ferran let it go.  
  
"Ha! There's my fucking baby!" Nadia clapped as her cat was carried through her door  
  
Alan handed her him smiling and didn't know what to do with his thought of her calling himself that.  
  
Nadia placed the cat down on the table  
"We thank you" and did a half bow  
  
"No problem. Hey so Ferrans confused about how we know eachother. Shouldn't we come up with a cover story or?"  
  
She shook her head  
"Eh. He doesn't need to know" she lit a cigarette while replying.  
  
"Well yea I wasn't planning on telling him the truth but"  
  
"Listen, don't take this the wrong way but you don't seem like a great liar. And honestly there's nothing we can say. Let them wonder"  
She moved to the couch  
  
"Well..that's accurate." He admitted joining her  
  
They played another video game. Nadia saw Alan's eyes itching down to her glass 2 feet away from her practical coaster.  
  
She mentally sighed but quietly leaned over, picked it up, and put it on the little plate.  
  
He didn't notice at first wrapped in the game but he looked down, looked at her, and smiled.  
She smiled at the tv too.  
  



	2. Chapter 2

i just came here to say that the way nadia responds to her cat with such enthusiasm and love and cursing is the way i responded to a grilled cheese sandwhich yesterday

and it wasnt bc i was inebriated it was just bc i love grilled cheese that much 


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is what I learned/saw in Russian Doll or related with  
> So SPOILERS

Don't kill yourself 

Don't be alone 

Ask for help 

Friends are the real shit 

 

You can be successful and smart and still be dying inside maybe others won't see it but you'll feel it 

Everything catches up 

 

Different perspectives can change so much 

Shame comes from not thinking you deserve something and is usually wrong 

 

Some synagogues are sexist af 

But I think out of all the religions I've been in and seen, Judaism is not the one I would think to seek to haunt people 

 

The melons were guilt?

Who hurt you is still inside you when you hurt yourself bc you blame yourself for it 

It's the most enraging thing 

 

I'm not the only one who's reflection terrifies them 

 

Watch your stoves man 

 

Maybe the universe is as obsessive as we are 

 

Eyeliner stays on a long time 

 

Once the characters realized there were many universes with their friends still being affected it made Nadia value altruism more even tho that was the whole point human connection 

 

Never let your friend design your bathroom 

 

"I'm the hole where a choice should be"

"I'm the abyss" 

 

If a sweet old man tells you to stop smoking would it make you consider it more?

 

I really loved when Nadia flat out said to her friends and her choices

"I need you to help me and you're not helping me youre hurting me"

 


End file.
